Sofia Tolstaya. What is it like to be “the wife of a genius and a great man”? Sophia is thick, like regular furniture

(nee Bakhmeteva, in her first marriage - Miller)

Countess, wife of a poet, prose writer and playwright. Friendship and meetings with Tolstoy are one of the most light pages V recent years life of Dostoevsky. Tolstoy was an extraordinary woman. She graduated from one of the closed women's colleges educational institutions, knew 14 languages, was on friendly terms with many outstanding people of her time: , and others who visited her literary salon, knew very well world history and literature, was well versed in art, had extraordinary musical abilities. Famous French writer and the literary historian wrote in 1895 about his work on the study and translation of Russian writers: “If I was able to grasp some features; constituting the essence of their genius, if their books became clear to me after diligent study of their authors, I owe this to a person of rare merit: Countess Tolstoy, who died a few months ago, the widow of the most subtle poet Alexei Konstantinovich. She combined all the qualities that we are accustomed to finding among the Russian intelligentsia. I can’t imagine how a foreigner, a Westerner, would be able to understand the confused souls and thoughts of Dostoevsky or Aksakov, if these vague geniuses had not shone with a bright light, having been passed through the diamond prism of the mind of this an extraordinary and versatile woman. It was she who inspired me with the idea of ​​​​acquainting the French public with works so distant and so unusual, and she helped me overcome the fear of my undertaking.”
Tolstoy's St. Petersburg salon, according to the testimony of contemporaries, stood out favorably from other secular salons: in the atmosphere of genuine art, the ease and nobility of tone inherent in the hostess herself reigned here.
Dostoevsky treated Tolstoy with great respect and there were always friendly relations between them. The writer’s archive contains a note from Tolstoy to him, most likely dating back to 1878 (they met in the second half of the 1870s): “Fyodor Mikhailovich, please, please come to us at least for a minute - or today at 10 I'll be home at about 10 o'clock in the evening, or tomorrow morning - I really want to see you. I really regret that I didn’t see your wife - I hope we’ll meet you another time. Goodbye, isn't it? S. Tolstaya».
It was Tolstaya who sent Dostoevsky a collective telegram from admirers of his talent in connection with the triumph of his Pushkin speech. In response, Dostoevsky sent Tolstoy a letter on June 13, 1880, which indicates that he always treated her with great respect and warmth. The letter ended with the words: “Please accept, dear Countess, my deeply cordial greetings. I value your affection towards me too, too much and therefore I am yours forever.”
recalls: “But most often in the years 1879-1880, Fyodor Mikhailovich visited the widow of the late poet, Count. Aleksey Tolstoy, Countess Sofia Andreevna Tolstoy. She was a woman of enormous intelligence, very educated and well-read. Conversations with her were extremely pleasant for Fyodor Mikhailovich, who was always amazed at the countess’s ability to penetrate and respond to many of the subtleties of philosophical thought, so rarely accessible to any woman. But, in addition to his outstanding mind, gr. S.A. Tolstaya had a tender, sensitive heart, and all my life I remember with deep gratitude how she once managed to please my husband.” And then A.G. Dostoevskaya talks about how Tolstaya fulfilled Dostoevsky’s cherished desire - to have a good reproduction of his favorite work - “The Sistine Madonna” by Raphael. Tolstoy’s gift was infinitely dear to Dostoevsky; he “was touched to the depths of his soul by her heartfelt attention,” writes A.G. Dostoevskaya - and that same day I went to thank her. How many times in the last year of Fyodor Mikhailovich’s life did I find him standing in front of this great picture in such deep emotion that he did not hear me enter, and, so as not to disturb his prayerful mood, I quietly left the office. My heartfelt gratitude to Countess Tolstoy is understandable because with her gift she gave my husband the opportunity to bear several enthusiastic and deeply felt impressions in front of the Madonna!”
More detailed description Tolstoy left the salon, apparently visiting it after the death of her father or learning about it from her mother: “Of the literary salons in St. Petersburg, visited by Dostoevsky in the last years of his life, the most significant was the salon of Countess Tolstoy, widow of the writer Alexei Tolstoy<...>. The Countess was one of those inspirational women who, although not creative themselves, are able, however, to inspire writers with wonderful ideas. Alexei Tolstoy valued his wife’s intelligence very highly and did not publish anything without her advice. Having become a widow, the Countess settled in St. Petersburg<...>. Having settled in St. Petersburg, Countess Tolstaya began to receive in her house all her husband’s former friends, poets and writers, and tried to make new literary acquaintances. Having met my father, she hastened to invite him to her place and was very kind to him. Her father dined with her, attended her evenings, and agreed to read several chapters from The Brothers Karamazov in her salon before their publication. He soon became in the habit of visiting Countess Tolstoy during his walks to exchange news of the day. Although my mother was somewhat jealous, she did not object to Dostoevsky’s frequent visits to the countess, who at that time had already passed the age of a seductress. Always dressed in black, with a widow's veil on her gray hair, and her hair simply combed, the countess tried to captivate only with her intelligence and kind demeanor. She very rarely went out and by four o'clock she was always already at home, ready to offer Dostoevsky the usual cup of tea. The Countess was very educated, read a lot in all European languages ​​and often drew my father’s attention to some interesting article published in Europe. Dostoevsky spent a lot of time creating his novels and, naturally, could not read as much as he would have liked. Count Alexei Tolstoy was in poor health, and he spent more than half of his life abroad. He made numerous friends there, with whom the Countess maintained constant correspondence. They, in turn, sent their friends who came to St. Petersburg to her, and they became zealous visitors to her salon. Thanks to conversations with them, Dostoevsky came into contact with Europe, which he always considered his second fatherland. The polite and amiable tone that reigned in the Countess's salon pleasantly distinguished it from the triviality of others. literary salons. Some of his old friends from Petrashevsky’s circle had become rich and now willingly invited him to their place. famous writer. The father accepted these invitations; but he did not like the intrusive luxury of newly acquired wealth; he preferred the comfort and discreet elegance of Countess Tolstoy’s salon.
Thanks to his father, this salon soon became fashionable and attracted many visitors. “When Countess Sophia invited us to her evenings, we came if we had no more interesting invitations; when she wrote: “Dostoevsky promised to come to one of us,” then all other evenings were forgotten, and we made every effort efforts to come to her,” an old lady from high society St. Petersburg who fled to Switzerland recently told me. Admirers of Dostoevsky, who belonged to the highest circles of St. Petersburg society, asked Tolstoy to introduce them to their father. She always agreed, but it wasn't always easy. Dostoevsky was not a secular person and did not try at all to seem amiable to people he did not like. Meeting benevolent people, pure and noble souls, he was so nice to them that they could never forget him and even twenty years after his death they repeated the words spoken to them by Dostoevsky. If his father found himself in front of one of the snobs with whom the St. Petersburg salons were full, he remained stubbornly silent. In vain did Countess Tolstaya try to break his silence by skillfully asking him questions; the father answered absentmindedly “yes”, “no” and continued to regard the snob as an amazing and harmful insect. With such intolerance, my father made many enemies, which usually did not bother him much. This arrogance of Dostoevsky was in striking contrast to the exquisite politeness, the admirable courtesy with which his father responded to letters from his admirers from the provinces. Dostoevsky knew that all his thoughts, his advice were received with reverence by rural doctors and teachers public schools and priests from small parishes, while the St. Petersburg veils were interested in him only because he was in fashion.”
Judging by the memoirs of the wife of the estate manager A.K. Tolstoy's Pustynka, although not entirely reliable, Dostoevsky was in the second half of the 1870s. at Tolstoy's in this estate Pustynka near St. Petersburg. In Dostoevsky’s notes for 1880 there is an entry: “To stop by before leaving to gr. Tolstoy."

September 23, 1862 Lev Nikolaevich Tolstoy married Sofya Andreevna Bers. She was 18 years old at that time, the count was 34. They lived together for 48 years, until Tolstoy’s death, and this marriage cannot be called easy or cloudlessly happy. Nevertheless, Sofya Andreevna gave birth to 13 children to the count, and published both his lifetime collection of his works and a posthumous edition of his letters. Tolstoy, in his last message, written to his wife after a quarrel and before leaving home for his last path to the Astapovo station, he admitted that he loved her, no matter what - but he couldn’t live with her. The love story and life of Count and Countess Tolstoy is recalled by AiF.ru.

Reproduction of the painting by artist Ilya Repin “Lev Nikolaevich Tolstoy and Sofya Andreevna Tolstaya at the table.” Photo: RIA Novosti

Sofya Andreevna, both during her husband’s life and after his death, was accused of never understanding her husband, not sharing his ideas, and being too down-to-earth and far from the count’s philosophical views. He himself accused her of this; this, in fact, became the cause of numerous disagreements that overshadowed the last 20 years of their life together. And yet, one cannot blame Sofya Andreevna for being a bad wife. Having devoted his entire life not only to the birth and upbringing of numerous children, but also to caring for the home, farming, solving peasant and economic problems, as well as preserving creative heritage great husband, she forgot about dresses and social life.

Writer Lev Nikolaevich Tolstoy with his wife Sophia. Gaspra. Crimea. Reproduction of a photograph from 1902. Photo: RIA Novosti Before meeting his first and only wife, Count Tolstoy, a descendant of an ancient noble family in which the blood of several noble families was mixed, had already managed to make both a military and a teaching career, was famous writer. Tolstoy was familiar with the Bersov family even before his service in the Caucasus and his travels around Europe in the 50s. Sophia was the second of three daughters of a doctor of the Moscow palace office Andrey Bers and his wife Lyubov Bers, maiden name Islavina. The Bers lived in Moscow, in an apartment in the Kremlin, but often visited the Islavins’ Tula estate in the village of Ivitsy, not far from Yasnaya Polyana. Lyubov Alexandrovna was friends with Lev Nikolaevich’s sister Maria, her brother Konstantin- with the count himself. He saw Sophia and her sisters for the first time as children, they spent time together and Yasnaya Polyana, and in Moscow, they played the piano, sang and even staged an opera theater once.

Writer Lev Nikolaevich Tolstoy with his wife Sofya Andreevna, 1910. Photo: RIA Novosti

Sophia received an excellent education at home - her mother instilled in her children a love of literature from childhood, and later received a diploma as a home teacher at Moscow University and wrote short stories. In addition, the future Countess Tolstaya was fond of writing stories from her youth and kept a diary, which would later be recognized as one of the outstanding examples of the memoir genre. Returning to Moscow, Tolstoy no longer found the little girl with whom he had once staged home plays, but a charming girl. The families began to visit each other again, and the Berses clearly noticed the count’s interest in one of his daughters, but for a long time they believed that Tolstoy would marry the eldest Elizabeth. For some time, as you know, he himself doubted, but after another day spent with the Bers in Yasnaya Polyana in August 1862, he made his final decision. Sophia captivated him with her spontaneity, simplicity and clarity of judgment. They parted for several days, after which the count himself came to Ivitsy - to a ball organized by the Bers and at which Sophia danced so that there was no doubt left in Tolstoy’s heart. It is even believed that the writer conveyed his own feelings at that moment in War and Peace, in the scene where Prince Andrei watches Natasha Rostova at her first ball. On September 16, Lev Nikolaevich asked the Bersovs for their daughter’s hand in marriage, having previously sent Sophia a letter to make sure she agreed: “Tell me how honest man, do you want to be my wife? Only if with all your heart, you can boldly say: yes, otherwise it’s better to say: no, if you have a shadow of self-doubt. For God's sake, ask yourself well. I will be scared to hear: no, but I foresee it and will find the strength to bear it. But if I’m never loved by my husband the way I love, it will be terrible!” Sophia immediately agreed.

Wanting to be honest with his future wife, Tolstoy gave her his diary to read - this is how the girl learned about the groom’s turbulent past, about gambling, about numerous novels and passions, including a relationship with a peasant girl Aksinya, who was expecting a child from him. Sofya Andreevna was shocked, but hid her feelings as best she could, nevertheless, she will carry the memory of these revelations throughout her life.

The wedding took place just a week after the engagement - the parents could not resist the pressure of the count, who wanted to get married as soon as possible. It seemed to him that after so many years he had finally found the one he had dreamed of as a child. Having lost his mother early, he grew up listening to stories about her, and thought that his future wife should be a faithful, loving companion, mother and assistant who fully shared his views, simple and at the same time able to appreciate the beauty of literature and the gift of her husband. This is exactly how he saw Sofya Andreevna - an 18-year-old girl who abandoned city life, social events and beautiful outfits for the sake of living next to her husband on his country estate. The girl took care of the household, gradually getting used to rural life, so different from the one she was used to.

Leo Tolstoy with his wife Sophia (center) on the porch of a Yasnaya Polyana house on Trinity Day, 1909. Photo: RIA Novosti

Sofya Andreevna gave birth to her first child, Seryozha, in 1863. Tolstoy then began writing War and Peace. Despite the difficult pregnancy, his wife not only continued to do household chores, but also helped her husband in his work - she rewrote drafts completely.

Writer Lev Nikolaevich Tolstoy and his wife Sofya Andreevna drink tea at home in Yasnaya Polyana, 1908. Photo: RIA Novosti

Sofya Andreevna first showed her character after the birth of Seryozha. Unable to feed him herself, she demanded that the count bring a wet nurse, although he was categorically against it, saying that then the woman’s children would be left without milk. Otherwise, she completely followed the rules established by her husband, solved the problems of peasants in the surrounding villages, even treated them. She taught and raised all the children at home: in total, Sofya Andreevna gave birth to Tolstoy 13 children, five of whom died in early age.

Russian writer Lev Nikolaevich Tolstoy (left) with his grandchildren Sonya (right) and Ilya (center) in Krekshino, 1909. Photo: RIA Novosti The first twenty years passed almost cloudlessly, but grievances accumulated. In 1877, Tolstoy finished work on Anna Karenina and felt deep dissatisfaction with life, which upset and even offended Sofya Andreevna. She, who sacrificed everything for him, in return received dissatisfaction with the life that she had so diligently arranged for him. Moral quest Tolstoy led him to formulate the commandments by which his family was now to live. The Count called, among other things, for the simplest existence, giving up meat, alcohol, and smoking. He dressed in peasant clothes, made clothes and shoes for himself, his wife and children, and even wanted to give up all his property in favor of the villagers - Sofya Andreevna had to work hard to dissuade her husband from this act. She was sincerely offended that her husband, who suddenly felt guilty before all of humanity, did not feel guilty before her and was ready to give away everything he had acquired and protected by her for so many years. He expected from his wife that she would share not only his material, but also his spiritual life, his philosophical views. Having had a big quarrel with Sofia Andreevna for the first time, Tolstoy left home, and when he returned, he no longer trusted her with the manuscript - now the responsibility for rewriting the drafts fell on his daughters, of whom Tolstaya was very jealous. The death of her last child also crippled her, Vani, born in 1888, did not live to be seven years old. This grief initially brought the spouses closer together, but not for long - the abyss that separated them, mutual grievances and misunderstandings, all this pushed Sofya Andreevna to seek solace on the side. She took up music and began traveling to Moscow to take lessons from a teacher. Alexandra Taneyeva. Her romantic feelings for the musician were no secret either to Taneyev himself or to Tolstoy, but the relationship remained friendly. But the count, jealous and angry, could not forgive this “half-betrayal.”

Sofya Tolstaya at the window of the house of the head of the Astapovo station I.M. Ozolin, where the dying Leo Tolstoy lies, 1910. Photo: RIA Novosti. In recent years, mutual suspicions and resentments grew into almost manic obsession: Sofya Andreevna re-read Tolstoy’s diaries, looking for something bad that he could write about her. He scolded his wife for being too suspicious: the last, fatal quarrel took place on October 27-28, 1910. Tolstoy packed his things and left home, leaving Sofya Andreevna farewell letter: “Don’t think that I left because I don’t love you. I love you and feel sorry for you with all my heart, but I cannot act differently from what I am doing.” According to the stories of her family, after reading the note, Tolstaya rushed to drown herself - they miraculously managed to pull her out of the pond. Soon information came that the count, having caught a cold, was dying of pneumonia at the Astapovo station - his children and wife, whom he did not want to see even then, came to the sick man’s house stationmaster. The last meeting of Lev Nikolaevich and Sofia Andreevna took place just before the death of the writer, who passed away on November 7, 1910. The Countess outlived her husband by 9 years, was involved in the publication of his diaries, and until the end of her days listened to reproaches that she was a wife unworthy of a genius.


There is still controversy about this couple - there has never been so much gossip about anyone and so many speculations have arisen about them as about the two of them. The story of the Tolstoys' family life is a conflict between the real and the sublime, between everyday life and dreams, and the spiritual abyss that inevitably follows. But who is right in this conflict is an unanswered question. Each spouse had their own truth...

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Lev Nikolaevich Tolstoy was born on August 28, 1828 in Yasnaya Polyana. The count came from several ancient families; the branches of the Trubetskoys and Golitsyns, the Volkonskys and the Odoevskys were woven into his genealogy. Lev Nikolayevich’s father married the heiress of a huge fortune, Maria Volkonskaya, who had spent too much time as a girl, not out of love, but the relationship in the family was tender and touching.


Mother little Leva died of a fever when he was one and a half years old. The orphaned children were raised by aunties, who told the boy about what an angel his late mother was - she was smart, and educated, and sensitive with the servants, and took care of the children - and how happy the priest was with her. Although it was good story, but it was then that the imagination of the future writer took shape perfect image the one with whom he would like to connect his life.

The search for an ideal turned out to be a heavy burden for the young man, which over time turned into a harmful, almost manic attraction to the female sex. The first step to discovering this new side of life for Tolstoy was a visit to a brothel where his brothers brought him. Soon he would write in his diary: “I committed this act, and then stood by this woman’s bed and cried!”

At the age of 14, Leo experienced what he believed to be love when he seduced a young maid. Tolstoy, already a writer, will reproduce this picture in “Resurrection,” revealing in detail the scene of Katyusha’s seduction.

The whole life of young Tolstoy was spent developing strict rules of behavior, spontaneously evading them and stubbornly struggling with personal shortcomings. There is only one vice he cannot overcome - voluptuousness. Perhaps fans of the great writer’s work would not have known about his many predilections for the female sex - Koloshina, Molostvova, Obolenskaya, Arsenyeva, Tyutcheva, Sverbeeva, Shcherbatova, Chicherina, Olsufieva, Rebinder, the Lvov sisters. But he persistently wrote down in his diary the details of his love victories.

Tolstoy returned to Yasnaya Polyana full of sensual impulses. “ This is no longer a temperament, but a habit of debauchery“, he wrote down upon arrival. “ Lust is terrible, reaching the point of physical illness. He wandered around the garden with a vague, voluptuous hope of catching someone in the bush. Nothing stops me from working."

Desire or love

Sonechka Bers was born into the family of a doctor, an active state councilor. She received a good education, was smart, easy to communicate, and had a strong character.


In August 1862, the Bers family went to visit their grandfather at his Ivitsy estate and stopped in Yasnaya Polyana along the way. And then 34-year-old Count Tolstoy, who remembered Sonya as a child, suddenly saw a lovely 18-year-old girl who excited him. There was a picnic on the lawn, where Sophia sang and danced, showering everyone around with sparks of youth and happiness. And then there were conversations in the twilight, when Sonya was timid in front of Lev Nikolaevich, but he managed to get her to talk, and he listened to her with delight, and in parting said: “How clear you are!”

Soon the Berses left Ivitsy, but now Tolstoy could not live a day without the girl who won his heart. He suffered and suffered because of the age difference and thought that this deafening happiness was inaccessible to him: " Every day I think that we can’t suffer anymore and be happy together, and every day I get crazier."Besides, he was tormented by the question: what is this - desire or love? This difficult period attempts to understand oneself will be reflected in War and Peace.

He could no longer resist his feelings and went to Moscow, where he proposed to Sophia. The girl happily agreed. Now Tolstoy was absolutely happy: “Never have I imagined my future with my wife so joyfully, clearly and calmly.” But there was one more thing left: before getting married, he wanted them not to have any secrets from each other.


Sonya had no secrets from her husband - she was pure, like an angel. But Lev Nikolaevich had plenty of them. And then he made a fatal mistake that predetermined the course of further family relations. Tolstoy gave the bride to read his diaries, in which he described all his adventures, passions and hobbies. For the girl, these revelations came as a real shock.


Only the mother was able to convince Sonya not to give up the marriage, she tried to explain to her that all men of Lev Nikolaevich’s age have a past, they just wisely hide it from their brides. Sonya decided that she loved Lev Nikolaevich strongly enough to forgive him everything, including the courtyard peasant woman Aksinya, who at that time was expecting a child from the count.

Family everyday life

Married life in Yasnaya Polyana began far from cloudless: it was difficult for Sophia to overcome the disgust that she felt towards her husband, remembering his diaries. However, she gave birth to Lev Nikolaevich 13 children, five of whom died in infancy. In addition, for many years she remained Tolstoy’s faithful assistant in all his affairs: a copyist of manuscripts, a translator, a secretary, and a publisher of his works.


For many years Sofya Andreevna was deprived of the delights of Moscow life, to which she had become accustomed since childhood, but she humbly accepted the hardships of rural existence. She raised the children herself, without nannies or governesses. In her free time, Sophia copied the manuscripts of the “mirror of the Russian revolution” completely. The Countess, trying to live up to the ideal of a wife, which Tolstoy had told her more than once, received petitioners from the village, resolved disputes, and over time opened a hospital in Yasnaya Polyana, where she herself examined the suffering and helped as much as she had the knowledge and skills.


Everything she did for the peasants was actually done for Lev Nikolaevich. The Count took all this for granted and was never interested in what was going on in the soul of his wife.

Out of the frying pan and into the fire...



After writing "Anna Karenina", in the nineteenth year of family life, the writer experienced a mental crisis. He tried to find peace in the church, but could not. Then the writer renounced the traditions of his circle and became a real ascetic: he began to wear peasant clothes, conduct subsistence farming, and even promised to distribute all his property to the peasants. Tolstoy was a real “house builder”, having come up with his own charter later life, demanding its unquestioning implementation. The chaos of countless household chores did not allow Sofya Andreevna to delve into her husband’s new ideas, listen to him, and share his experiences.


Sometimes Lev Nikolayevich went beyond the bounds of reason. He demanded that younger children not be taught what was not necessary in simple life. folk life, then wanted to give up the property, thereby depriving the family of their livelihood. He wanted to renounce the copyright to his works because he believed that he could not own them and make a profit from them.


Sofya Andreevna stoically defended the interests of the family, which led to the inevitable family collapse. Moreover, her mental anguish was revived with new strength. If earlier she did not even dare to be offended by Lev Nikolaevich’s betrayals, now she began to remember all the past grievances at once.


After all, every time she, pregnant or who had just given birth, could not share the marital bed with him, Tolstoy became infatuated with another maid or cook. He sinned again and repented... But he demanded obedience from his family and compliance with his paranoid rules of life.

Letter from the Other World

Tolstoy died during a trip he took after breaking up with his wife at a very old age. During the move, Lev Nikolaevich fell ill with pneumonia, got off at the nearest large station (Astapovo), where he died in the house of the station master on November 7, 1910.


After the death of the great writer, a flurry of accusations fell on the widow. Yes, she could not become a like-minded person and an ideal for Tolstoy, but she was an example of a faithful wife and an exemplary mother, sacrificing her happiness for the sake of her family.


While sorting out her late husband's papers, Sofya Andreevna found a sealed letter from him to her, dated in the summer of 1897, when Lev Nikolaevich first decided to leave. And now, as if from another world, his voice sounded, as if asking for forgiveness from his wife: “ ...with love and gratitude I remember the long 35 years of our life, especially the first half of this time, when you, with the maternal selflessness characteristic of your nature, so energetically and firmly carried out what you considered yourself called to. You gave me and the world what you could give, you gave a lot mother's love and selflessness, and one cannot help but appreciate you for this... I thank you and I remember and will remember with love for what you gave me.

At that time, no one could have imagined that the granddaughter of the classic would become interested in the peasant poet Sergei Yesenin, and the entire literary community would be talking about this rebellious aristocratic novel.

She is closely connected with the life and work of her great husband. This woman donated secular society and the usual city life in order to be with him. After the death of the writer, it was Sofya Andreevna Tolstaya who was involved in the publication of his legacy. The biography of this woman will be discussed in detail in the article.

L.N. Tolstoy got married on September 23, 1862. Sofia Andreevna Tolstoy's maiden name is Bers. At that time, the girl was 18 years old, and Lev Nikolaevich was 34. The couple lived together for a very long time - 48 years. They were separated by the death of Count Tolstoy. However, this marriage cannot be called cloudlessly happy and easy. Sofya Tolstaya gave birth to Lev Nikolaevich 13 children. She published Tolstoy's lifetime collected works, as well as a posthumous edition of the great author's letters. Lev Nikolaevich, in his last message addressed to his wife after a quarrel, admitted that, in spite of everything, he loves her, but cannot live with her. After that, he set off on his last journey to St. "Astapovo".

Was Sofya Andreevna a bad wife?

Both during her husband’s life and after the death of Lev Nikolaevich, Sofya Andreevna was accused of failing to understand her husband and share his ideas. She was allegedly too down-to-earth and very far from Tolstoy’s philosophical views. Lev Nikolaevich himself accused her of this. In fact, this was the main reason for their disagreements, which darkened at least the last 20 years of married life. However, she cannot be called a bad wife. This is evidenced by the biography of Sofia Tolstoy. She devoted her entire life to giving birth and raising children, solving economic and peasant problems, taking care of the house and preserving the creative heritage of her husband. For this she had to forget about both dresses.

Tolstoy's friendship with the Bers family

Count Tolstoy, before meeting his wife, had already completed his pedagogical and military career. In addition, he became a famous writer. Tolstoy knew the Bersov family even before his service in the Caucasus and his trip to Europe in the 1850s. Sophia is the second daughter of Andrei Bers, a doctor who worked in the Moscow palace office, and Lyubov Bers, his wife ( maiden name- Islavina). In total, the family had three daughters, as well as two sons. The Bers lived in Moscow, but rarely visited the Tula estate of the Islavins, located in the village of Ivitsy, from where it was very close to Yasnaya Polyana. Lyubov Alexandrovna was friends with Maria, the sister of Lev Nikolaevich. And Konstantin, her brother, was a friend of the count himself. Tolstoy first saw Sophia and her sisters as children. They spent time together in Moscow and Yasnaya Polyana, sang, played the piano, and even once staged an opera performance.

Education

Tolstoy's future wife, Sofya Bers (Tolstaya), received an excellent education at home. From childhood, her mother instilled in her children a taste for literature. Then she graduated from Moscow University, receiving a diploma as a home teacher. It is known that Sophia Bers wrote short stories. She has been composing them since her youth. In addition, Sophia kept a diary, which was later recognized as one of the best examples of the memoir genre.

How Sofya Andreevna charmed Tolstoy

Tolstoy, who returned to Moscow, found a charming girl already grown up instead of the little girl he remembered as Sophia Bers. The families became closer again and began visiting each other. The Bers noticed Lev Nikolayevich's interest in his daughter, but believed that Tolstoy would woo the eldest, Elizabeth. It is known that at one time he himself doubted, but in August 1862, after another day that Leo Tolstoy spent with his family, he made a final decision. The girl captivated him with her clarity and simplicity of judgment, and her spontaneity. They parted for several days, and then the count himself went to Ivica. Here the Berses held a ball. Sophia danced on it so that Tolstoy cast aside his last doubts.

Reading Tolstoy's diary

On September 16, Leo Tolstoy asked for the hand of Sophia Bers, having first sent a letter to the girl in order to ensure her consent. Tolstoy, wanting to be honest with his future wife, gave Sophia his diary to read. Bers learned about Lev Nikolaevich's turbulent past, about gambling, about many novels, including a relationship with Aksinya, a peasant girl who was expecting a child from the count. This shocked Tolstoy’s future wife, but she hid her feelings as best she could. Nevertheless, Sophia will carry the memory of these revelations throughout her life.

Wedding and first years of marriage

A week after the engagement they got married. The count wanted to marry his bride as soon as possible. It seemed to Tolstoy that he had finally found the one he had been dreaming about since childhood. Lev Nikolaevich, who lost his mother early, often listened to stories about her. He wanted his future wife to be just as loving, faithful, an assistant and mother who shared his views, simple and at the same time able to appreciate her husband’s gift and the beauty of literature. This is exactly how Sophia Bers seemed to him - an 18-year-old girl who abandoned beautiful outfits, social events, and city life in order to be close to her husband and live on his country estate. She took care of the household, gradually getting used to rural life, so different from her previous one.

The Tolstoy family world

Sofya Andreevna created a special family world. The Tolstoys developed their own traditions. This was felt most of all during family holidays, was also felt at Christmas, Trinity, Easter. All these holidays were loved in Yasnaya Polyana. They were prepared in advance and always celebrated solemnly. The family went to St. Nicholas Church for the liturgy. It was located two kilometers south of the estate. Every year at Christmas they put up a Christmas tree, decorated it with gilded nuts, cut out figures of animals from cardboard, etc. In addition, a masquerade was held in Yasnaya Polyana. Sofya Andreevna, Lev Nikolaevich, their children, as well as guests, peasant children, and servants took part in it. Ankovsky pie and turkey were invariably served at the holiday dinner.

Sophia brought the pie recipe from her family. It was given to the Bersam by Professor Anke, a doctor and family friend. In the summer, the Tolstoys' life came to life. Swimming was arranged in the river. Voronke, playing gorodki and tennis, mushroom picking, picnics, home performances, musical evenings. We often dined in the courtyard and drank tea on the veranda. Many guests invariably came to the Tolstoys, and all of them found a place to stay for the night. Sofya Andreevna could feed everyone and honor everyone with her attention. According to A. Fet, the countess combined two important qualities- “poetry of nature” and “practical instinct”.

In the family of Ilya Lvovich, Sophia’s son, a daughter, Anna, was born in 1888. She became the first granddaughter of Sofia Andreevna and Lev Nikolaevich. From that time on, the large Tolstoy family grew larger every year. The grandchildren became the most welcome guests in Yasnaya Polyana.

First manifestation of character

In 1863, Sofya Tolstaya gave birth to her first child, Seryozha. At the same time, Tolstoy began writing his great novel War and Peace. His wife, despite her difficult pregnancy, not only took care of household chores, but also found time and energy to help her husband with his work - she copied drafts thoroughly.

After the birth of Serezha, Sofya Andreevna showed her character for the first time. She was unable to feed her son herself, so she demanded to bring a wet nurse, although Tolstoy was categorically against it. He said that in this case, this woman’s children would be left without milk. In all other respects, Sofya Tolstaya followed the rules established by her husband. She solved the problems of the peasants who lived in the surrounding villages and treated them. Sofia Tolstaya raised and taught all her children at home. Of the thirteen, five died at an early age, and the death of each of them left a mark on the soul of this woman.

Resentments accumulate

The first 20 years passed almost without clouds, but claims gradually accumulated. Tolstoy completed Anna Karenina in 1877. He felt dissatisfied with life. This greatly offended and upset my wife. After all, Sofya Andreevna Tolstaya sacrificed everything for him, and in return - dissatisfaction with the life that she arranged for him so diligently.

Lev Nikolaevich's moral quest took shape in the commandments by which his family now had to live. The Count called, among other things, for a simple existence, for giving up smoking, alcohol, and meat. He wore peasant clothes and made his own shoes and clothes for his children, his wife and himself. Lev Nikolaevich even wanted to give up his property in favor of the village residents. It took a lot of effort for his wife to dissuade him from this act.

Sofya Andreevna Tolstaya could not come to terms with the fact that Lev Nikolaevich, having felt his guilt before humanity, did not feel it in front of her. He was ready to give the peasants everything he had acquired over many years. And the count expected from his wife that she would completely share both material and spiritual life, the philosophical views of Lev Nikolaevich. Tolstoy, having had his first serious quarrel with his wife, left home. After his return, he no longer trusted Sofya Andreevna with his manuscripts. The responsibility of rewriting drafts now fell on the daughters, and Leo Tolstoy's wife, Tolstaya Sofya Andreevna, was very jealous of them.

The story with Alexander Taneyev

The death of Vanya, the last child born in 1888, crippled the wife of the great writer. This boy did not live to be 7 years old. At first, the common grief brought the spouses closer together, but not for long. The abyss that separated them, misunderstandings, and mutual grievances pushed Sofya Andreevna to find solace on the side. Tolstaya became interested in music. She began to travel to Moscow often, where she took lessons from Alexander Taneyev. Neither Tolstoy nor Taneyev himself had a secret about Sophia’s romantic feelings for the latter, but the relationship between them remained friendly. Nevertheless, Lev Nikolaevich, angry and jealous, could not forgive his wife for this “half-betrayal.”

Fatal quarrel

Mutual grievances and suspicions have grown into an almost manic obsession in recent years. Tolstaya began to re-read her husband’s diaries, trying to find something bad about her in them. Lev Nikolaevich scolded her for being too suspicious. A fatal quarrel occurred between the spouses on the night of October 27-28, 1910. The Count packed his things and left, leaving a farewell letter to Sofya Andreevna. He reported that he loved her, but could not do otherwise. Having read the note, as the family testifies, Sofya Andreevna rushed to drown herself. The fat woman was miraculously pulled out of the pond.

Tolstoy's illness and death

After some time, information was received that Lev Nikolaevich, having caught a cold, was dying at the Astapovo station from pneumonia. His children and Sofya Nikolaevna, whom he did not want to see even then, came to his stationmaster’s house. Just before the writer’s death, there was last meeting spouses. Lev Nikolaevich passed away on November 7, 1910.

Life of Sofia Andreevna after the death of her husband

Sofia Tolstaya, the wife of Leo Tolstoy, outlived her husband by nine years. She published his diaries. Tolstoy's departure and death had a difficult effect on her. She could not forget that she had not seen her husband conscious before his death.

In recent years, Sofya Andreevna lived in Yasnaya Polyana, putting in order her husband’s legacy. In the last years of her life, Tolstaya described books and objects in closets and rooms. In her husband’s bedroom and his office, Sofya Andreevna left the furnishings last day his life, conducted the first tours of these rooms.

She died on November 4, 1919, of pneumonia, having lived to the age of 75. Not far from the estate, at the Kochakovsky cemetery, Sofia Tolstaya was buried. A photo of the graves of this woman and Tatyana Andreevna Kuzminskaya, her sister, is presented above.

Sister of Sofia Andreevna

The daughters of Dr. Andrei Bers have been described many times.

Elizaveta Bers was considered a rather boring, although educated, girl. Subsequently, she wrote and published things for the people and research on the exchange rate of the Russian ruble. Sonya and Tanya were friendly with each other and were similar to each other - capable, flirtatious and not poetic. About Sonya Bers, his future wife, Tolstoy writes on September 8, 1862: “There is nothing in her for me that has always been and is in others - conventionally poetic and attractive, but irresistibly draws.”

Sonya was flirty and attractive. “In the evening she didn’t give me notes for a long time. Everything was boiling inside me. Sonya took on Tatyana's Bersein, and this seemed to me an encouraging sign. We walked at night."

Lev Nikolaevich, even in “Childhood”, “Adolescence” and “Youth”, noted the peculiarities of the family way of expressing himself, a kind of family argot. Tanya Bers gave the term to denote a conventional flirtatious manner.

Young, lively, changeable, easily included in other people's lives, able to believe in herself, able to retell her experiences in different ways, well-read Tatyana Andreevna, in addition, was talented - very musical and possessed a wonderful contralto.

We know about her personal life from her memoirs, written in old age, with extensive use of literary sources.

In the book “My Life at Home and in Yasnaya Polyana” Tatyana Andreevna not only uses Sofia Andreevna’s memories, but also makes complex comments works of art Lev Nikolaevich. Her life observations and characteristics sometimes turn out to be quotes.

Tatyana Bers was courted by Kovalevsky and Anatoly Shostak. According to her, she kissed Shostak in the forest, and they spoke to each other words similar to the words spoken by Anatoly Kuragin to Natasha Rostova.

Since there was no one else in the forest except them, Tolstoy could not have known these words; rather, Tatyana Andreevna recognized them from “War and Peace” - she knew this work with many variations, since she wrote from dictation more than once.

Nevertheless, Anatoly Shostak undoubtedly existed, but the characterization that the memoirist gives him, she, as already noted in the literature, quotes from Nagornova’s memoirs, “The Original of Natasha Rostova in War and Peace,” published in 1916.

Of course, Nagornova could have recorded the statements of Tatyana Bers herself, but the memoirist cites the description in quotation marks, as if with these quotation marks she makes her memories objectively justified by the general opinion: “He was self-confident, simple and free from shyness. He loved women and was liked by them. He knew how to approach them simply, kindly and boldly. He knew how to inspire them that the power of love gives rights, that love is the highest pleasure.”

The characterization of Anatoly Shostak is probably related to the characterization of Anatoly Kuragin, but Anatoly Kuragin was written down by Tolstoy before Anatoly Shostak unsuccessfully arrived in Yasnaya Polyana.

A big place in the memories of Tatyana Bers and Sofia Andreevna is occupied by Tanya’s relationship with Lev Nikolaevich’s older brother, Sergei Nikolaevich.

Sergei Nikolaevich lived almost his entire life on the estate, was engaged in hunting, lived a somewhat archaic life, and observed the morals of the old nobility. He was an excellent brother, had the ability to resolve misunderstandings through personal negotiations, and many times he helped Lev Nikolaevich out of financial difficulties in his youth. Lately he lived on the estate, hunted and read English novels, learning the language self-taught.

Tatyana met Sergei Nikolaevich very early - she was his relative. There was a twenty year age difference between them - no less; Initially he treats her like a girl.

Sergei Nikolaevich was handsome, very calm, very independent and Tatyana Andreevna liked him. It seems to me that he himself was not trying to start an affair; Those stories that are given in the letters are poetic, but they talk about how an old man sits with a young girl, with the sister of his brother’s wife.

For fifteen years now, Sergei Nikolaevich had been married to the gypsy Maria Shishkina, whom he bought out of the camp very young. He had children from her, but had not yet formalized the marriage.

Lev Nikolayevich once believed that his brother should leave the bridge for retreat, and half-jokingly said that Sergei should marry the general’s daughter. The family life of Sergei Nikolaevich was no secret to anyone, since Lev Nikolaevich constantly visited his house.

But a long romance began - Bersein Tatyana. It probably all started with the coquetry of a young girl. Sergei Nikolaevich probably spoke kind words to Tanya more than once. Once he waited out a thunderstorm with her in a quiet room of his old estate. Tanya was afraid of thunderstorms and asked her brother-in-law to stay with her.

The word “love” may have been snatched from the lips of a stern and inexperienced person, although not on that stormy evening.

Tatyana Andreevna was persistent.

Tolstoy wrote on January 1, 1964: “How do I look at your future? You want to know. Like this. – Seryozha promised to come to us in two days and has not come until now. We found out that Masha was giving birth, but even before that I became very worried.”

Tolstoy persuades his daughter-in-law: “In my soul, I tell you before God, I wish Yes, but I'm afraid that No».

Meetings took place, Tanya went hunting with Lev Nikolaevich.

And Lev Nikolaevich often visited his brother on the Pirogovo estate. There were many memories associated with this property and there was good hunting there.

On August 9, 1864, Tolstoy writes about Sunday afternoon in Pirogov: “We went along the old road. Four miles away I ran into a swamp and missed a snipe. Then, near Pirogov, near the Ikonskiye settlements, I killed a great snipe and a snipe. Tanya and a bunch of village boys were present and screaming.”

Lev Nikolayevich slept in a wing in Pirogov, then he wrote down: “Serezha and Tanya had something going on - I can see the signs, and it’s very unpleasant for me. Nothing but grief and grief for everyone will come from this. And there will be no good in any case.”

But meetings still took place in the Yasnaya Polyana garden; in the Yasnaya Polyana hall Tatyana sang Fet’s romances at the piano.

Lev Nikolaevich listened and was worried.

Tatyana Andreevna, young, beautiful, who rode a horse well, pleased Sergei Nikolaevich and intoxicated him with the wine of her youthful charm. Before that, hunting was almost Sergei Nikolaevich’s only occupation. He used the ribs of hunted wolves to make fences for the flower beds of his neglected estate. He liked gypsy songs, but he had already grown tired of them.

Tatyana Andreevna asked people whether a brother could marry his brother’s wife’s sister. According to canonical rules this was prohibited; It was possible to allow marriage only for both couples at the same time, since then they were not yet relatives before the ceremony was performed. It was possible to find an accommodating priest who would perform a wedding without asking too many questions. In this case, a perfect marriage was not dissolved.

Things seemed to be heading towards a wedding, but Sergei Nikolaevich suddenly stopped attending in April 1864. Lev Nikolaevich wrote a letter to his brother. In the first two paragraphs he calls him “you”. Then he switches to “you”. The letter is full of conversations about Tanya. The letter says that nothing is said about Sergei Nikolaevich in the house that cannot be said in front of him.

Lev Nikolaevich even before this wrote a letter to Tatyana Andreevna: this letter is a warning; it was written on January 1, 1864. At the end of January he writes to his sister Marya Nikolaevna about this. The content of the letters is such that it is clear that there is nothing to count on for marriage: Sergei Nikolaevich loves his wife and children. But they continued to woo Sergei Nikolaevich.

Lev Nikolaevich informed his sister that Seryozha was ready to go abroad to her, probably to escape from a confusing situation. But Masha gives birth, and Seryozha stayed. Everything is confusing. Tolstoy writes about his brother: “He and Tanya fell in love with each other and, it seems, very seriously.”

At the end of the letter there is a message about myself: “I am writing a novel from the twelfths.”

Lev Nikolaevich is convinced that family life it should be simple, that one must demand fidelity, come together after mature reflection, take a wife from a suitable social status, and everything around him is confusing. He wants to divorce his brother from his unmarried wife, he sends his sister money from her husband, whom she divorced, he knows that she has another husband, and suddenly in February he tells his sister: “God bless you.” better happiness“, which is given not by external conditions, but by internal conditions of the state of the soul: love, severity towards oneself and honesty in the relationships of life.”

Lev Nikolaevich is honest and tests his honesty a hundred times in the novel, rebuilding relationships between people, and at the same time writes to his sister about his brother: “I wrote to you about his secret (please, do not mention it in your letters). He is afraid that they will read it at home.” He continues: “He loves Masha, feels his obligation to her and the children and loves and is loved there,” and at the same time he demands that Sergei marry Tanya, because he has been her fiancé for twelve days.

Tatyana Bers was not a one-woman girl.

She was attracted to her handsome, tall cousin Alexander Mikhailovich Kuzminsky, she liked many of Lev Nikolaevich’s acquaintances, and she also liked Lev Nikolaevich himself, an older friend; Sergei Nikolaevich was chosen as a husband with the sincerity of delusion.

On June 9, 1865, Sofya Andreevna writes: “On the third day everything was decided for Tanya and Seryozha. They are getting married. It’s fun to look at them, and I rejoice at her happiness more than I once rejoiced at mine. They were in the alleys, in the garden, I played the role of some kind of patroness, which was fun and annoying. Seryozha became nice to me because of Tanya, and all this is wonderful. The wedding is in twenty days or more.”

But the news came that Masha Shishkina was giving birth. Sergei Nikolaevich went home and did not return, writing in a letter that there would be no wedding with Tanya.

Sofya Andreevna writes in her diary:

“Nothing happened. Seryozha deceived Tanya. He acted like the most vile person..." Then again the notes: "She loved him very much, and he deceived that he loved... And for twelve days the bride and groom were kissing, and he assured her and told her vulgarities and made plans. There's a scoundrel all around. And I will tell everyone this, and let my children know this and not act like him when they learn this story.”

Publicity was brewing: there were rumors that the gypsy mother was going to complain to the bishop that the wedding was illegal.

Tanya wrote a touching letter of refusal to Sergei Nikolaevich. A copy was sent to parents.

The grief of the Bersovs in the Kremlin after they received a letter that Tanya had already sent a refusal to Sergei, as they say in the novels, was beyond description.

Sergei Nikolaevich completely refused to marry, and on June 25, 1865, Lev Nikolaevich wrote to his brother:

“I can’t help but devote at least a small part of the hell into which you put not only Tanya, but the whole family, including me.”

The girl fell ill and was sent abroad. At one time, those around her had intentions to marry her to the rich, recently widowed Dyakov; then she married Kuzminsky.

When the wedding was being prepared, an incident occurred that seemed touching to the Bers.

“My sister became the bride of A. M. Kuzminsky, whom she had loved since childhood; but since he was cousin, then it was necessary to find a priest to marry them.

Completely independently of them, Sergei Nikolaevich then decided to marry Marya Mikhailovna and also went to the priest to set the wedding day. Not far from the city of Tula, about 4-5 miles away, on a narrow country road, secluded and little traveled, two crews meet. In one - my sister Tanya with her fiancé Sasha Kuzminsky, without a coachman, in a convertible, and in the other, in a carriage, Sergei Nikolaevich. Having recognized each other, they were very surprised and excited, as both later told me. They silently bowed to each other and silently went their separate ways.

It was a farewell to two people who passionately loved each other, and fate played with them, arranging this extraordinary, unexpected and instant meeting in the most improbable, romantic conditions.”

Life in the office where I wrote great book, walked on her own. What was decided timidly nearby, with reservations, with letters to influential relatives, what was still a compromise and indecisive, was here rethought many times, re-decided many times and a solution was found that was final.

The relationship between Sofia Andreevna and Lev Nikolaevich at that time was good: she helped her husband, it was as if she was beginning to understand him - she already liked War and Peace, though without the war scenes, she liked it in a simplified way.

Lev Nikolaevich quarreled with his brother. I wrote him several harsh letters, then made peace, involuntarily and affectionately. Relations with the house, however, deteriorated: Lev Nikolaevich was angry.

Sofya Andreevna was pregnant, she was sitting in her room on the floor near the chest of drawers and sorting through bundles of scraps. Lev Nikolaevich came in and said:

- Why are you sitting on the floor? Stand up.

- Now, I’ll just put everything away.

– I’m telling you – get up now! – he shouted loudly and went into the office.

Sofya Andreevna was offended and went after her husband to find out why he was shouting. Tatyana Andreevna, who lived next to Sofya Andreevna, suddenly heard glass breaking downstairs and shouting: “Go away! Go away!

Tatyana Andreevna entered the office. Sonya was no longer there; there were broken dishes on the floor and a barometer that always hung on the wall. Lev Nikolaevich stood in the middle of the room, pale, his lips trembling. It turned out that in response to Sofia Andreevna’s quiet question: “Levochka, what’s wrong with you?” – Lev Nikolaevich threw a tray of coffee on the floor, then tore the barometer off the wall.

Tatyana Andreevna concludes her story like this: “So Sonya and I could never understand what caused such rage in him. And how can you recognize this complex internal work taking place in someone else’s soul?”

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